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La Vie de Bohème

free spirit2 “I used to think I was the strangest person in the world, but then I thought there are so many people in the world, there must be someone just like me who feels bizarre and flawed in the same ways I do. I would imagine her, and imagine that she must be out there thinking of me too. Well, I hope that if you are out there and read this and know that, yes, it’s true I’m here, and I’m just as strange as you.” ~ Frida Kahlo

This has really resonated with me and rang incredibly true to my heart.

I’ve always been a wanderer, a free spirited girl prancing to the beat of her drum. As I continue to make my forays into the world “out there”, I felt like an outsider silently gazing in. People often say that they don’t “get” me. They have always tried to define me and put me in a safe box that they could label and understand. I am the quiet, dorky girl who spends her time in bookstores and cafes. I am the weirdo who zones out when she paints. I am the girl whose thinking is not a straight line, but rather a labyrinth that she is trying to navigate. I am the flower child who couldn’t care less what others thought about how she live her life.

I believe that people should not be confined in a box. We don’t come in a package with instruction manuals.

We may not always be understood and may not always be accepted, but we should be free on who we choose to be.  Instead of falling into the trap of molding ourselves to some predefined role, I hope we all feel free to soar with our wings fully spanned, feeling the gust of wind in our bare skin. To plunge with passion into the unknown and hear the music of our souls. Free to waltz in the verdant fields and feel the dews beneath our toes. Free to wander in silver streams with stardust in our wispy hair.

So here’s to us my kindred spirit. I hope you find comfort in the midst of your transformation. I hope you glide to your own melody in search of a song. I hope you get wonderfully lost in your adventures. I hope you sprinkle glitters wherever you go.Let them hear your sylphlike roar.

free spirit 3

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Writer’s Itch

writingBlink, blink, blink.

The mouse cursor seemed to taunt me while I stare at the perfectly empty computer monitor. For many,the difficult part of writing is the very beginning, when they’re staring at a blank sheet of paper… in my case, it’s the blank screen.  There’s an electric hum of anticipation in my fingers while it rest on the keyboard but it can’t find the words to type.

Here goes my confession…

I’ve been a lurker for some time. For the past few months, I hit a creative slowdown. You know that bizarre moment when your muse took a vacation  and you don’t know when she will get back? Yes, that moment.

Being muse less can be scary and out of it, self-doubt is born. I wonder if I can still stay up at midnight and scribe forlornly in my lonely room.Pushing things has always caused me more difficulty in the end. And so instead of escape, I let the feeling pass. When I have come up against this, the urge to create again comes from the oddest places, so I learned to sit back and let inspiration come in it’s own time.

I think all artists go through these peaks and valleys. Sometimes, you also have to take courage to go IN and be your own muse. To explore the nook and cranny of your heart and let it take you to far flung places you’ve never dreamed of.

Sometimes, you just have to take the leap of faith and go for it. To accept that dry spells are part of the magical life you live and you can always find the potion to create again.

Well-known writing teacher Natalie Goldberg says, “Just keep your hand moving and write!”

…and so I did. Let my hands do the talking.